CORPORAL Jones used to bore the pants off
the rest of the platoon in Dad's Army with tales of mock heroism in the Sudan, before degenerating into the worst flap imaginable amid cries of "Don't panic!" at the first sign of trouble.
Known as one of football's great romantics, he said: "If someone said you can pick a team that is going to bore the pants off
everyone but is going to finish in the top six, I would say thanks very much but find someone else.
'For 80 minutes we were in control and maybe we have just forgotten how to bore the pants off
people,' Jones said.
Bryson's challenge is to take subjects that bore the pants off
us, like particle physics, and make them interesting to ordinary thickos, er, people (that's us).
With all the engineering, mechanics and anality involved when it comes to parts, it sounds like it would bore the pants off
someone as ignorant about engineering as me.
You gamble so you can gamble the next day" - Bert Ambrose FAMOUS FIVE Five facts to bore the pants off
people in the pub cannot breathe through their mouths 1Horses 2 A horse's age can usually be accurately determined by its teeth until the horse is about nine years old Horses produce around 10 gallons of saliva a day 34 The average horse's heart weighs approximately 9lb-10lb 5 It is estimated there are about 750million horses in the world THE shock news this week was Michael O'Leary's Gigginstown Stud removing all 60 of its horses from Willie Mullins yard following a dispute over training fees.
He's also in his element hosting quiz shows, and reveals his three children from a former marriage have nicknamed him 'Factoid' - "Because I'm full of useless facts!" He adds: "I know all kinds of weird and wonderful things, I read New Scientist, I'm interested in quantum physics, I'm a real history buff - Elizabethan and Roman history - I could bore the pants off
you about dinosaurs or anything you want to know."
It doesn't have the vindictive nature of Home Alone and it never threatens to bore the pants off
you like 1999's Bicentennial Man.
Do teachers set out to bore the pants off
If you wanted the character development, complicated love knots or the dramatic tease of a multi-faceted plot, then go and watch a film called Magnolia by Paul Thomas Anderson - it'll bore the pants off
But, if any team can bore the pants off
the Sunderland hordes, it could be Stoke.
And one of his pieces, entitled 'Waste', looks set to bore the pants off